Bridget M

It's over??

I cannot believe a week ago at this time, we took our final exam for NU630, last Tuesday, we presented our posters, and it is over. 

Yesterday was mother's day weekend, and I had no homework over my head, no upcoming tests, I had breakfast in bed, did some girl shopping by myself, and took a nap.  Life is good.  

This week, we pick up our caps & gowns on Wednesday, graduation is this weekend.  My parents are coming to town from Buffalo to see this- and I still cannot believe it is over.  

For 6 years, I have been working toward this, and it's over.  Okay, not really, after this weekend, next Tuesday I am leaving for Boston for a few nights for the NP exam review course with a dear friend, hopefully we don't have too much fun while we're there.  Next month, I am attending a WOCN (wound ostomy continence nursing) conference in New Orleans, I have to take the certification exam, and in addition, I need to get a job!  

It's crazy, and I still don't believe it's over.  

What does it cost to be an APRN?

Membership American Academy Nurse Practitioners (student rate)- $55

NP exam- $240 (member rate, remember I registered at the student rate)

CT APRN license- $200

Registered Controlled Substance Practitioner License- $40

DEA #:  Controlled Substance Registration Certificate- $551 (3 years)

CT Registered Nurse License- $100/yr

Fitzgerald FNP Review Course- $460 (plus hotel, gas, wine)

Tuition- (not sure, I have forgotten already- more than orthodontist braces, but not much more)

 

What am I forgetting?? 

 

 

Senioritis

I haven’t posted in a long time, and that is perhaps, reflective of how this semester is going.  This is the hardest semester yet- 9 credit hours, and I am still working full-time.  I am fortunate that I completed as many clinical hours as I did early in the semester so that is one less worry on my mind, but the worst part of the semester is motivating myself to finish.  These will be the longest 6 weeks I have experienced, yet I am sure they will fly be quickly. 

I have a serious case of Senioritis going on- a colleague of mine identified it for me, and I have rough memories of it from my senior year of high school, I don’t remember feeling this way when I was an undergraduate.  It is difficult for me to concentrate on the tasks at hand, what is most important, putting first thing first.  I just want to go shopping, or lose myself in reality TV that I haven’t been watching in years, that I suddenly feel that I cannot miss. 

Writing my capstone has been like pulling teeth, I ordinarily have a clear path in mind, just need to work out the details on how to get there.  This time, I have such a frighteningly serous block, I don’t know how to best manage it.  Today, I had been able to make some progress on it, and it feels less foggy.  I haven’t been posting my blogs either, again the writers’ block is preventing me from doing this too, and this is not the hardest stuff I have to write about! 

The capstone is due on 4/11, final on 5/2, and graduation is 5/14.  These days are so far away, but getting closer.  Keep routing us on!

 

Job hunting

Graduation is May 14^th, and I’m starting to sweat the upcoming job hunt. 

When I graduated from nursing school in 1990, I had received a full scholarship from Sisters of Charity Hospital in Buffalo, where I was guaranteed a job upon graduation.  To fulfill the scholarship requirements, I had to work 2 years full time-, which was nothing, though at the time felt like an eternity.  In addition, I was getting job offers from other area hospitals, and the hospital where I had been working at as an aide since I was 16. Two other Charity hospitals, St. Mary’s in Rochester, NY and Hotel Dieu in New Orleans offered to buy me out of my contract if I would work there.  I was 22 years old, and getting job offers from everywhere, my head was swelling. 

I cannot ever remember worrying about finding a job since I have been a nurse.  I had done travel nursing, pool nursing, and for the last 11 years worked at one institution.  I never worried about writing the perfect resume, or a jaw-dropping cover letter.  I had attended job fairs, but often as a curiosity, no scent of desperation was present, perhaps an air of smugness, I never had trouble finding a job. 

This time around feels different.  No longer the “shooting fish in a barrel” ease of job hunting.  I am obsessing about the resume, and have written it and rewritten it over Christmas break.  I am thinking of actually buying a suit- cannot interview in scrubs from the last job as I have done in the past.  I am throwing hints at key people in my area, checking out the Monster and job hunting sites, and the job postings at my professional organizations to see if something perfect comes along that I need to act on. 

There is no air of smugness this time, but a generous bit of humility.  I don’t just want any job, I want one that will nurture me through my first few years as an NP.  I would like one close to home but am willing to travel, possibly even relocate if the job is right.  I want this first job to be perfect, but will settle for very good.  

 

Going first?

Tuesday January 18^th was our first day of class for NU 630.  We got our syllabus and reviewed what is expected from us during the semester.   One of the assignments is to present a case study before our class.  We are all assigned dates to do this, 2 students per date. 

At the end of class everyone is vying for which day they want to do this, no one wants to go first.  This year, I volunteered to go first, and now I am wondering if I need to get my head examined.

The advantages to being the first to present include getting it out of the way.  It is worth 25% of our grade, it gets a large hunk of work out of the way- the only work left for the semester includes two exams and the capstone. 

The disadvantage is that when you go first, you don’t have the benefit of watching your classmates’ mistakes before your turn.  It is a lot of work to do right out of the starting gate of the semester.  One big disadvantage I had forgotten, the first day of class that I will be presenting is my daughter’s 9^th birthday.  We can celebrate the following weekend I suppose. 

So I hit the ground running for  my final semester, ready or not, here I come!

 

what I did on my semester break

As I stated earlier, I managed to get in about 78 clinical hours on semester break!  

My current clinicalpreceptor is a physician in the community whom I have known for many years, who was gracious enough to help me get my final hours in, even though he had already agreed to take a UCONN NP student this semester.  He has a small private practice, and he knows, intimately all his patients, their spouses, children, issues and often makes house calls.  His wife is a nurse and a former instructor at UCONN and helps in the practice.  Late one afternoon, an elderly woman with abdominal pain and weight loss had been added on to his schedule at the end of the day.  She took a cab in with her husband, who had mild dementia that she had been caring for, and brought a suitcase packed in case he admitted her.  He ordered an x-ray and labwork- and his wife drove the two of them to the local ambulatory care center for the tests.  In addition to being an old fashioned doctor, he also uses an EMR, and has a desktop computer in each exam room- and has looked up and printed medication & medical information to patients with questions, and even an instructive YouTube video of how to self inject Lovenox to a patient with questions.  He gives them an updated copy of their problem list and medications with every visit. 

This week, I start my clinical rotation with a Wound Ostomy Continence NP in Bristol- (another drive!)  I feel fortunate to have an amazing preceptor who is working in my chosen field- which is getting me thinking about the future and what I intend to do for work after graduation. 

Class started on Tuesday January 18th- time is flying by!

 

4 months to go!

January 14th marks 4 more months until graduation- I am psyched and scared at the same time.  This is the most intense semester of the program, a whopping 9 credits, 2 nights a week on the other side of the state- thank goodness for Kristin, my trusty commuting companion!  This semester also requires 240 clinical hours- fortunately, I was able to get 60 hours of my specialty hours honored from previous coursework that I had completed in 2007-8, and I hustled to get additional hours over semester break.  Between my time at the correctional facility, and my new clinical site, I accumulated 78 hours over semester break!  (It would have been more, but I had to call in with a GI bug one day, and a snow day on another).  In addition, I was able to finish my capstone proposal- and I thought I would rest on semester break, NOT!

 

Finishing up at the correctional facility was bittersweet for me.  I knew I needed a more broad clinical experience- there are not many little old ladies or men in prison that I saw- and after a while, I was seeing the same kinds of patients over and over.  However at Christmastime, the staff hung decorations and stockings on the wall, and they made one for me!  I wasn’t a staffer, but the staff was so good to me they included me in their holiday party and cookie exchange- and I did not feel worthy, after all I was only a lowly student!  To see a stocking with my name on it in glitter just blew me away.  

 

 

 

 

 

Five months to go

This has not started out to be a good week- work is beating me up, I feel stretched in all directions.  My baseline anxiety level is pretty high, and in effect, making me unable to function in matters that should be simple and easy.  I feel so ineffective, defeated, and that’s the bad news. 

The good news is that today marks five months until graduation and final grades are in- I am pleased and delighted with the results.  It was a boost I really needed today.  In addition, I received a card from a former preceptor who saw a mention of me in the National Wound Ostomy Continence Nurses newsletter and wrote to congratulate me and tell me she was proud of me.  It touched me so deeply to open that card on a day when I wanted to change my name, email and cell phone number and hide in my car in the Dunkin Donuts drive through line, listening to Barenaked for the Holidays on my iPod. 

I am so grateful for the things that pick me up when I’m feeling down, for the things that draw me out of my shell when I want to stay in bed.  I did not have a great day today, but I had some awesome moments that tell me I will get through.

Thanks, Liz for the card! 

 

My last Christmas

On Tuesday, I will take my final for this semester, it will be over, and I will celebrate Christmas with my family.  This will be my last Christmas as a graduate student.

This will be my last Christmas that I will not be able to focus fully on Christmas.  This will be the last Christmas that I won’t have a capstone, clinicals and assignments in the back of my mind, clouding the season.  This is the last Christmas without that sense of urgency underlying Christmas. 

Next Christmas will be different.  I will have a clean house, coordinated, decorated- perhaps I will transform the top of my cabinets into a Christmas wonderland with fake snow and snowmen- lights in the window, perhaps I will be a part of choosing the tree, rather than sending my husband and daughter to the tree farm while I stay home and review my notes for my exam. 

Semester break is just the calm before the storm, and it never lasts long enough.  Next year will be different. 

Next year will be different, I cannot believe it is this close.

 

May 14, 2011

It is exactly 6 months from today that I graduate...

Full steam ahead!

I'm just saying...